"I just want to make this VERY clear on myself. I hath been finding something very annoying. Lately, I hath seen many on my watch list get so many DD's in one year that it's getting to me. I decided to compare my thoughts to one o' my songs and to someone elses. Though, I am not releasing any names. So my songs are so fokking dark and destructive? Over the top? Bloody and raging inside? Maybe I am letting something off my chest. Perhaps I am actually putting my life into what I see. I am seriously tired o' seeing people come to my account and tell me that I am too destructive in my songs."

"Is this so? Go look around at other accounts and look at the many who hath written far more darkened images than me. Go look around and look at the blood, gore, guts, and images that seek violence with so much fokking destruction in the images. Then come back and tell me if I am the only one writting upon what darkened images. Dost the world -have- to be so 'happy-happy joy-joy'? I lived in a darkened world filled with violence and abused. I WAS ABUSED AS A CHILD!! ...Stop writing me notes saying my songs are 'over the top'. Go to other people who are writing the same things that I write. Some are so damned darkened with gore and cruel images. This is how I feel. This is what I see."

"I wrote another song. Yet I do not know if I should submit it. Since I see that so many others get such wonderful comments on the first day around. I hath waited a long while on my latest song for one comment. On my last journal, I took the time to thank those who helped me get where I am. Only two comments came in. So, Am I such a darkened person that no one even comes to thank me in return for the positive comments I gave for their pieces o' art? So, tell me. Why should I submit another song in? If I do, would I get positive or negative comments. Sorry, but this is how I feel right now. I lay down my hands and heart to put in comments on many o' the journals that come in. Now, again, tell me what it is that I do wrong. What is it that I am missing that makes me feel unpopular. I am not afraid to put my imagination into my songs. It is how I am. It is how I feel. It is me. Only me. How I feel. What I see. Where I go. Most importantly, what is going through my mind."

"I see a lot o' contests going on. So many prizes going out. I was offered to enter a contest, but NO poetry or songs allowed. So if I was suggested to come to this contest, then why are there no songs or poets allowed? That confuses the living hell out o' me. I just have to wonder. How is it that some o' these arts that I feel are 'stick people' arts get all the DD's while I see such beautiful arts get nothing. I did enter a contest once, I admit, there are some that were way better than me. Though, I am still trying to figure out why they could not have better taste in the winners. I am sorry, but this is what I feel right now. Oh well, I will have to move on I suppose."

"I hath had a rather terrible year so far. Lately my job hast treated my like shit. I got a family gone psycho. I have a beautiful soul who loves yet I cannot see her face to face, which I am trying to see her to begin with. People at work hath gotten negative attitudes upon me. Many souls hath blew up on me with yelling and screaming. I am alone. I hath dreamed o' having a family o' my own for many moon rises to come. So, I guess I am not having a very healthy future just yet. Why am I suffering? What did I do to deserve loneliness and misery? All I hath wanted is happiness. All I get is sorrow and sadness in my own end. My Grandpa died on my birthday a couple years back. There are things I want to talk 'bout with so many, yet, deep inside, there are times I do not talk 'bout 'em. Why? I do not know why. Perhaps that I hath been told I stress too much. It is starting to annoy the hell out o' me. Maybe one day I will tell someone what is going on. For now, I will have to let it out on my own before I let my darkened past be revealed to someone who cares. She already knows who she is. I am just not ready to reveal my mind just yet."

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"The arts and songs here are Copyrighted ©2005-2008 GargoylesBlood. Absolutely NONE o' these songs are to be duplicated, copied or distributed for any purpose at all whatsoever. Any o' my arts caught stolen -without- permission will not be tolerated."